Brown-Eyed Girl

Family Age: 2 months

Sometimes when you're in the muck of it all, it's hard to see how far you've traveled.

Our family is 2 months old.  And all things considered, we've all grown leaps and bounds together in our 8 weeks. 

We still have days that are pure chaos, where Jay comes home from work and I need lock myself in the bathroom to pee in private for a moment of peace for fear of my sanity (whoah that was a loooong sentence). But those days are getting fewer and far between. 

Stella's first night of Kindermusik

We're still eating crayons. 

Joel learned how to ride his bike without training wheels with absolutely no assistance.

Cuddle bugs on the couch

Yes, we're still obsessed with Batman. 

We're sleeping through the night in our own beds.  Lock down has been lifted and we're meeting some friends.  We're comfortable with boundaries.  We don't scream bloody murder when Mom leaves for 5 minutes. The girls take a nap every day in their room. We ate at a freaking restaurant...just the five of us!  We know Dad goes to work and comes home.  We wait for affirmation of "they're a friend" when a new person approaches.  Stella is speaking mostly-English and part Elmo.  Livvy now says at least 4-5 times more in English than we ever heard her speak in Russian.  Joel is eagerly learning English as well, and loves repeating lines from his favorite books.  Good, good, stuff folks. 

There's lots more to tell.  Better stories, more eloquent ways to capture what I want to say.  But I'm exhausted tonight.  And ya know what? Sometimes that's part of it, too. : )

Funkville.

"Everybody looks so happy!"

I'm told this a lot. Like, a lot, a lot. 

Yep, we're happy.  Yep, the kids are doing great.  They are doing amazingly well considering they've spent less than two months with us. 

On the flipside, we have some pretty tough moments. Some really bad days. Fine, let's be real, we've even had some all-around crappy weeks. 

Why am I awake?

But our kids, especially Joel because of his age, are dealing with some big, raw, nasty feelings from their past. Things that little people shouldn't have experienced. Abandonment, loss, distrust, neglect, more loss. 

And Joel? He's been in a funk. Acting out. Not eating. Clinging. Crying. Regressing. Behaviors we expected, behaviors we "understand", but behaviors that are definitely hard to work through. 

We finally broke down a wall yesterday and he told me he felt scared.  Scared that we were going to leave him.  (Thank you Lord for Google Translate) Then crumpled in my lap and let me rock him to sleep. 

And you know what sucks? I can't fix it. Not right away. I can do nothing more than assure him we'll always be a family, that we're going to be together, and prove that to him day after day after day. Has he heard that before? Maybe. And that sucks, too.  I know we'll earn his trust.  But I want to fix his hurt. Now. 

This week has required extreme patience. I have pulled every tip and advice from my bag of tricks. I was beginning to feel pretty pissed at how my sucky bag of tricks was not the least bit helpful. 

I needed out of the house. Out of Funkville.

So we went to the park.

And there it was.  A glimmer of hope.  A peek of sunshine through the clouds that he and I both needed (and apparently Jay, too).

He met a boy.

And made a friend.

(The boy's face was not disfigured, I just didn't feel it appropriate to put some stranger's kid on our blog)

They ran and jumped and chased each other.  They shared his cape and looked at the cars on his buddy's t-shirt. And an hour later when it was time to leave, I asked him if he made a friend.  My boy smiled from ear to ear and puffed out his chest.

"Dah, friend!" 

And I cried. I sent Jay the picture and he cried, too. (Sorry for ousting you, Jay.)

We needed a win this week. All of us. And it came in the unexpected package of a boy at the park.

So we're gonna take this friend thing and run with it. Maybe set up a playdate or two with a neighbor.  I can't fix his hurt, but I can help him find some new happiness.

We're gonna be okay, buddy.  We're gonna be okay. 

Resemblance

"You two look exactly alike!" a random stranger told Jay at the gas station.

How did you reply? I asked when he got back into the car and told me the story.

I told him "thanks," smiled, and we went on our way. 

You know, I think "thanks" is enough. 

The first day we met Joel.  His caretakers went on and on about how he looked like his "Papa" 

Trip #2 to visit Joel. Don't you just want to see a smile on that face?

Sure do love this boy.

This dude was definitely meant for our family. : )

A Day in the Life of the Naked Lala

Little Miss Livvy has many dolls she cares for. She calls them La-las.  She is a very attentive mini-Mama to almost all of her babies.  But not to naked Lala. 

Naked Lala had a real rough day today. 

Here's naked Lala in all her nudity embarrassed on the garage floor.  

 Then she got run over by bikes in the driveway several times. Joel found it hilarious.

 She took a nap in the backyard after she was flung off the swings.

 Was almost eaten by the ferocious Dottie after a Fruit Loops activity. (Note: Those are Lala's clothes, she has not always been a naked baby)

 Here Olivia sings to Lala before chucking her down the stairs.

 Time to eat Lala. She later fell off the stool.

Finally, Lala ends her day under a wet washrag on a stepstool. 

The sun will come up tomorrow, Lala.  Maybe it will be a better day.

We Took a Little Trip...

The natives were restless.  I sensed it was a case of the Happy Birthday Hangovers.  You know the kind, when you eat a lot of cupcakes and drink one too many Koolaids? Yep, that's the one. So call me crazy, but I thought it was time for a road trip.

 
So we picked up the baby whisperer...



...and headed to the cabin for a day trip.  It was the perfect getaway full of many "firsts"...

First pedicures

First walk on the trails

First time fishing

 

First exaggerated fish tales. 

 First chip sandwich. (Honestly, who's parenting this child?)

First gator rides. 

First time swimming in a lake. 

And checking out girls with Uncle Joeker. (Kidding, kidding) 

And we ended the day with a first cuddly boat ride.  

I know we'll spend many wonderful days at the cabin, but watching these "firsts" will always be extra special to me.  It's like seeing the world with a fresh set of eyes. 

Thanks Mom and Dad for the invite, and to Uncle Joeker for riding in the back of the van with the turbulent trio. Turns out a little fun in the sun and some fresh air were all we needed to cure the birthday blues!