Top 10 Questions We've Been Asked So Far...

Since announcing to our friends and family that we've decided to adopt, we've definitely been bombarded with a bunch of questions.  Which is totally normal.  Most people haven't been close to someone who has adopted internationally, so they have little to no experience on the subject.  They have many of the same questions I had when I began researching adoption. But many apologies have been exchanged from worried friends who think that they are "asking too many questions."  No worries, I really don't mind answering them! 

I thought it'd be fun to compile the top 10 questions we've been asked so far about our decision.

Q: How did you choose your country?
A: This is probably the hardest answer to condense in a short conversation.  It's hard to explain that after a year of researching countries, agencies, and programs - this is just the one that "felt right."  There were a lot of factors that weighed into our decision; age of children, speed of process, travel requirements.  But in the end, it was something Jay and I looked at each other and said "this is it."

Q. Do you know the kids yet? When will you know them?
A: Unfortunately, no we don't know them yet. It's kind of like we just found out we're pregnant, and we've yet to have an ultrasound.  We already love them, but we can only imagine who they are and how they'll change us. Many people choose to share their news of adoption once they've received a referral (meaning, when they know their child) but we kinda wear things on our sleeve, and we're going to need a heap-load of prayers. 

Q: When do you bring them home?
A: We don't know. International adoption is very unpredictable.  Our agency has told us right now that things are "typically" taking around a year. But when you're dealing with another country, things can change drastically on the turn of a dime.  It's out of our hands, so we're going to keep up with what we need to do on our end, and give up the need to be in control.

Q:  Will you have to travel?
A: Yes.  Our first trip will be after we verbally accept our referral.  The trip will last about a week, and we'll spend the majority of our time meeting and bonding with our kids.  Then I'm certain my heart will be ripped from my body when we return to the states without them and wait to be assigned a court date. Our second trip will include a court date, and then they are legally ours.  We then wait for visas to be processed.  We're hoping to stay in Russia for the duration of the wait, but we'll have to see.

Q:  What about their names?
A: They will have Russian names given to them by their birth mother.   We haven't quite decided how we're going to handle this yet.  They might keep their Russian names and we give them American middle names, we might give them American first names and keep their given names as middle names.  There are a lot of American equivalents to their Russian names - and we might just do that.  This is another thing that falls into the 'we're going to have to wait and see' category. There is a LOT in this category. Ha!

Q: Why two?
A: This was another gut feeling Jay and I instantly agreed on.  Siblings often have a harder time getting adopted because bringing two children into a home at once is a lot to handle.  We know it's going to have its ups and downs, but giving these kids the opportunity to have a loving home and stay with their sibling is something we want to do. They have lost everything, but they still have each other.  We have such a wonderful support system surrounding us that we know we're not in this alone. 

Q: No seriously, two? Are you crazy?
A: Yes. : ) But we're ready for our lives to be completely turned upside down for these kids. 

Q: So...what's happening right now? Any news to report? 
A: We're beginning our homestudy, and a LOT of paperwork.  We probably won't have much excitement to report for quite some time, other than "we finished this mound of paperwork - woo hoo!" Although this will probably THRILL us, you will more than likely not find it newsworthy. We know you're excited, but you're going to get the answer of "paperwork" for the next many months.

Q: Oh hey, I know so-and-so who adopted from such-and-such - do you want me to give your their contact info?
A: Yes! Every situation is different, but I still somehow manage to take some nugget of valuable information from every person I speak to.  We're all about educating ourselves as much as we can.  Sometimes the best experts aren't the ones who write the books - but the ones who've just lived it. 

Q: You know you're going to get pregnant now that you've decided to adopt, right?
A: Oh goodness, am I not showing? The glow about me didn't already give it away? Thank you for your kind thoughts, but I AM pregnant.  With two babies from Russia. : )

That is one special pee stick. : )